When Meetings Go On Too Long
by Banana Skittle
Summary: Random one-shots with some of your fav captains/vice captains and espada. What do the captains/vice-captains do in soul society when they get bored in a meeting? Also includes a quick little ficlet with some espada/the three traitor captains.
1. Why onemanga was banned in soul society

09/11/2008 00:06:00

There really is no point to this thing that I'm doing right now. My first one-shot. I'm surprised it's not a romance but you know how I am…Anyway, I got this idea when I was passing notes in class. Ummm…set before the events in bleach.

Disclaimer: I don't own bleach.

This is in notes, not speech just to make it clear and it happens in a particularly boring meeting with the captains and vice-captains. Hope you enjoy.

Gin: Psst, Ran.

Ran: Don't distract me-I'm listening.

G: Why not, he's talking about the second division, it's not like you need to pay attention anyway.

R: Wait, he's talking about what? And here I was looking so interested.

G: You got sprung girl.

R: Shut up.

Kyoraku: Sup?

R: Nothing. Captains should pay attention. That includes you, Gin.

G: No fair.

K: Yeah, why should we pay more attention than you?

R: Coz Toshirou will fill me in later.

Hitsugaya: Like hell I will.

R: Kids shouldn't swear.

H: Grown women shouldn't pass notes in meetings.

R: Touché.

K: Who's gonna fill you in now Ran-chan?

R: I think it's more who's going to fill you in?

G: The woman has a point.

R: Thank you.

K: Too bad she forgot Nanao-chan.

Nanao: Who forgot me?

K: Responsible vice-captains pay attention to meetings.

N: Only so their good-for-nothing captains don't have to. And anyway, they're talking about third division.

G: Shit!

RKNH: Haha, sucks to be you.

G: Not really since he just asked you a question Hitsugaya.

H: Fuck.

GR: Kids shouldn't swear.

H: F***

K: Better.

Shuhei: Leave me out of the conversation why don't ya?

Isane: They have a reason for leaving you out, why me?

S: What reason?

I: You suck.

S: Do not!

I: Do too.

S: Do not!

IHGRNK: Do too.

S: Shut up.

H: Quick, he's looking over here.

Byakuya: You do realise that what you're doing is morally wrong.

R: You say that with a straight face.

B: Technically it's a straight pencil since I wrote it.

R: You have no idea what you just said do you?

B: Only those with twisted minds would reach that conclusion.

K: How interesting that we're all blocking images from our minds at this moment.

N: Hitsugaya's going red.

R: OMG! How cute!!!

H: MATSUMOTO!

Abarai: Why does this side of the room suddenly have their eyes closed?

B: Because the lot of them have twisted minds.

A: You're passing notes, Kuchiki-taichou?

B: You know how to read, Renji?

A: -_-

B: XD

N: You guys spend too much time on the internet.

B: Only because of mangafox.

N: :-O

R: Traitor. I use onemanga.

G: As if. I've seen Naruto up the top of your screen many a time missy.

H: Usually when she's meant to be doing work.

R: Only then. I have better things to do in my free time.

N: I've heard of that.

G: It's called having Kira as your vice-captain.

B: Or Renji.

H: It's called threatening Matsumoto with rehab.

N: It's called hiding Kyoraku-taichou's sake.

KR: It's called being mean.

A: You deserve it.

I: I love Unohana-taichou so much.

S: Only coz she makes tea.

I: She gives me biscuits too.

S: Well la-de-dah miss well-fed.

Yamamoto: What an interesting conversation. Might I suggest that next time you try to ignore an important meeting you do it in a room that doesn't have mirrors behind you.

R: Sir we were-

Y: I won't listen to anyone who doesn't use mangafox. It goes against my principles.

RSIBKANGH: SIR!

So, just a bit of randomness on my part. Haha, you may have guessed I'm a mangafox girl. :P

R&R!


	2. Why Grimmjow never disobeys Aizen

Okay, so I know this started out as a one-shot and I know that I'm meant to be updating my other story but I suddenly realised that this would be a little more fun then staring at a blank document for three hours. Anyway, this is just a random ficlet from around the start of the arrancar arc. Tousen's talking in a meeting and the rest of the espada and our two fav traitors are getting a little bored. Again, passing notes.

Grimmjow: Hey, Ulquiorra. Guess who I saw in the world of the living when I last went there.

Ulquiorra: You mean when you got your ass handed to you on a plate by some random shinigami.

Grimmjow: You wanna fight me tough guy?

Ulquiorra: Simply stating a fact.

Grimmjow: Fuck off.

Ulquiorra: So who did you meet?

Grimmjow: Not telling anymore.

Ulquiorra: You're acting like a child.

Gin: Well he is only 6 months old.

Ulquiorra: So am I and yet…

Grimmjow: Shouldn't you be paying attention Ichimaru?

Gin: Shouldn't you? I've heard it all before.

Grimmjow: So? You should listen to your fellow traitor.

Gin: That hurts.

Ulquiorra: Technically we don't have to listen since he's simply repeating what he said last time.

Grimmjow/Gin: JUSTICE FOR THE WIN!!!

Ulquiorra: Very mature.

Grimmjow: I try my best pansy ass.

Gin: I laugh because you called him a pansy when you have no chance of living when he chooses to kill you.

Ulquiorra: Why would I kill trash?

Aizen: Why do you call my inventions trash?

Grimmjow: Wait, Aizen-sama. Why aren't you listening?

Aizen: Who do you think had to sit through fifty years of talks with Tousen as he justified himself to me and tried to make me walk the path of righteousness.

Ulquiorra: Gin?

Aizen/Gin/Grimmjow: He made a joke….Oh. My. Aizen-sama.

A/N: Aizen didn't write Aizen-sama. He just said Oh. My.

Ulquiorra: This is what happens when I try to be part of the comedy. People laugh.

Grimmjow: That doesn't make sense.

Aizen: I think he means they laugh for the wrong reason.

Gin: Haha, Grimmjow's dumb.

Grimmjow: Haha, at least I can open my eyes and not have everyone stare.

Gin: Coz yours aren't as pretty as mine.

Grimmjow: Are too!

Aizen: And you called Ulquiorra a pansy.

Grimmjow: Shut the fuck up!

Aizen: Who needs a sexta espada?

Gin/Ulquiorra: Not me.

Aizen: To the execution room!

Grimmjow: Ah, fuck.

Aizen: After Kaname stops talking of course.

Grimmjow: Yes! I get to live for another four hours!

Aizen: Good point.

At this point Tousen raises his head, unsheathes his sword and says:

"Suzumushi Tsuishiki: Enma Kōrogi"

Complete darkness permeated the room. Tousen's voice was the only sound anyone heard.

"Just because I'm blind doesn't mean I can't hear you writing. Now, back to what I was saying…"

Aizen suddenly thought of a better punishment for Grimmjow. Leave him alone in a room with Kaname for a while. The blue haired arrancar would never disobey him again.

Hmmm…didn't turn out as well as I wanted it to. Oh well, I wrote it in like ten minutes so it'll have to do. Check out my other fic Fighting Girl. Anyway…R&R my minions!


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